We are in the second week of January, the adrenaline of the holidays has already subsided a little, some of us returned to our normal work schedule, others resumed the projects that were on pause, schools are back, and in general everything seems to go back to normal. The normality.
It doesn't seem to some that December is a month outside of the year, it's as if it doesn't count, as if we were abstracted from the earth and taken to another dimension for a full month. And then the first days of January the UFOs spit us back into reality, and from one day to the next the life that you left a month ago returns to you and you ask yourself, Now where do I start? Or you realize you're already in the January race and you didn't even notice.
Some also come into this month more tired than they left it, and then add the pressure of getting back into daily activities, Christmas expenses and debts, excesses of all kinds, and mainly those in which we expose our emotional and, therefore, physical health and finally the blessed purposes that you set for yourself. It is a beautiful bomb of stress, anxiety, cortisol, adrenaline, mixed with excitement, fears, fatigue, etc.
And all this, the body and the mind, the recent thing, I call that the January slope, beyond the material, it is a mental slope, where the bills of the dates, plus life itself, make January one of the most complicated months in mental health.
And in truth I am not against setting new goals and seeking to grow as human beings, I myself look for it all the time and encourage us to do so; However, it does not seem to me that the message on these dates comes from a place of truth, love and compassion, I feel it as a created need and not truly sought, not a conscious change, or a departure from reflection, on the contrary, promoted by the market itself, big business and of course our non-allies, the systems of oppression.
And that is why in most cases you will not be able to deny it to me, interest is lost, lack of will appears and we end up abandoning the purpose, even though we are halfway through the year. And I say it again, the change that lasts should come from an internal motivation, revealed by one's own self-reflection, but obviously, that is a lot of work and few of us are willing to undertake the journey.
Returning to the topic of January, many approach the beginning of the month as a new cycle, it can be a new cycle for many, however, I feel that in the same way as the previous ideas it is an obligatory beginning, how about my cycle of the year past not finished? So how am I going to start a new one? What I'm trying to explain is that maybe I didn't want to end a cycle, that I felt good in the cycle, that I wasn't ready to close it yet, that I like it, etc. And well, it is logical that if I don't close a cycle, then I don't need to open another, or at least let's be aware that we are going to be in two cycles at the same time, going from one to the other because we didn't close the previous one, and well, to make a long story short. a tangle in our mind.
And you don't need January to start a cycle or December to end it, this happens and we don't need a month or a year, time is very subjective, and I'm sure you've experienced what happens when you're peeing outside a bathroom. who is busy, seconds feels like hours or not. I believe that time is an ally to make our life more practical, however, it is very relative and of course we cannot date our cycles, because our individuality is also included in them.
What I want to leave you with in today's episode are some ideas that, although they are not new, I am sure will help you connect more with yourself, find deeper reasons to set goals and objectives and of course reaffirm yourself more as the valuable human being that you are. And of course, if you live with an eating disorder, if you are in recovery, if you have a hard time accepting your body, if your relationship with food doesn't feel good, you can't stop listening to the next part.
Idea 1. Take it easy in January
It's never too late to set goals, make plans or get back to something. Do not pressure yourself to have purposes, because I assure you that when you find your purpose in life you will know it, as you will simply understand that it is it, there will be no obligation you will feel it within you. I don't want to say that it is easy or difficult, it has nothing to do with that, there will just be something internal that lets you know that it is your reason.
Idea 2. Take time to connect with yourself
As I have been discussing with you, I do not want to generalize, but the previous month is usually a time of many social and family commitments, where generally the personal space where we are with ourselves is modified, in the best of cases. Because in my case, and in the case of many people who have an ED, that part of time alone with oneself does not exist. It is only now that I begin to understand the meaning and begin to search for it and enjoy it. Start being nice to me, and have those moments of silence. Maybe you can relate to this situation, but I assure you that along with recovery from ED comes many gains like this enjoyment of oneself.o
And that is why I think it is important that before prospecting our goals or achievements for the year ahead, we start connecting with ourselves, connected with your version of the future, with that woman or man who is the greatest version of you and then create the how, because and why I want to get there.
Idea 3. Identify those purposes that have nothing to do with who you are.
If you accept it, many times you have bought resolutions on social networks, TV, the neighbor, the cousin, etc., I have decided to do things that do not fit at all with who I am.
I'll tell you when I was very young, I decided that I wanted to study to be a model, and my mom, since she was so pretty, signed me up for some modeling, makeup, etc. classes. It should be noted that those who know me, I am not girly, I do not like to wear a lot of makeup, or get glamorous, I rather like very basic things. In other words, the modeling had nothing to do with me.
But well, that was my purpose to be a model, and of course, the teacher bumped into me because I didn't walk like a model, I was embarrassed to walk in the middle of everyone, coupled with my eating disorder and all the mental things that it implies, and well finish the course. And I never used any of the things they taught me in my life, nor was I a model or anything.
You see how that purpose was not mine, in fact it started because many people told me you should be a model, but of course it was not for me.
And surely you have a similar story and I would love to hear it.
Idea 4. The purpose adds or subtracts from you.
Especially if you have an eating disorder, or you are not having a good time with your body and food, it is important that you reflect on whether that purpose adds or subtracts from you, what? Life, self-love, courage, compassion, respect, generally add to your values or detract from them.
Ask yourself, what's behind that goal of losing weight, starting a new exercise plan, a new diet? Add to your life! How? How is it going to make you better?
And then you ask yourself why, as many times as necessary, until you get to the deepest reason.
Idea 5. Make peace with your body
91% of women on planet Earth in Western culture are not comfortable with their bodies, and 98% of those same women have undergone some type of treatment or diet to change their body.
So most likely a resolution this year, one of your resolutions has to do with solving this problem. And I sense that you are thinking about doing it the same way you have done it in previous years, restricting, punishing, putting yourself at risk mentally and physically, and before continuing I remind you that if you are trying again it is because the previous ones have not worked. .
Start with an eating plan, eat healthier, cut down on carbs, exercise more, eat less, fast, divide food into food groups, count your macros, reduce fats and sugars, all of this is called diet culture and yes I know that you think it is for your health, but it is not in most cases, because health includes the mind and body and for my soul as well and putting your body in a prolonged energy deficit, the no trusting in it, in not accepting it, deteriorates your mind and your ability to attend to your vital human needs.
And in a practical way, as you have already experienced, none of the above works, it has left you and will leave you in the same place where you started, even if it goes well for you, but it generally leaves you in a worse place physically and mentally.
This time I invite you to start trying new routes, to accept your body. First, realize that the problem is not you, rather it is something that you have been made to believe, of course because if we believe that I am the problem I am going to try to solve it, and then I try to solve it by buying and doing everything what the market tells me, and since now we consumers are more informed, they sell it to us as health and since it is not a diet it means eating healthy, and well, pure nonsense.
También empieza a buscar contenidos más alineados con la aceptación de todos los cuerpos, que busque crecer en ti el amor y la compasión. Depura tus redes sociales, si eso te lleva a compararte o a hacer conductas de riesgo, busca aliados.
In fact, I'm going to leave you the link so you can download my free ebook that is on my page. Se llama "Harmonize yourself with your body" and it is a guide where I will help you begin your journey to this body acceptance, recognize yourself beyond your physical appearance and discover yourself. The truth is incredible
In addition to that, there are already many books, free accounts, and many resources that require investment, and it would not be bad to invest on this occasion in something that truly lasts over time and in your well-being, in the end you have already invested a lot trying to change your body, give it the opportunity now to accept it.
Idea 6. Shine and shine so pretty that you spread your shine
Don't let anything dim your light, shine because you deserve to shine. And I put it as an important point for me, because regardless of whether or not you achieve your goals, the most important thing is that everything you choose in this 2024 and throughout your life, maintains the brightness with which you were born, with which you were made Keep your values, no purpose that connects to your highest version of yourself will lead you to break what is important to you.
Don't let anything make you believe that you can't shine, that the labels that have been placed on you or that you have placed on yourself are a curtain of your brilliance, you are a world of possibilities and they are all possible.
I wish you the best year, the best moment, the best cycle and the best life for you. With everything that comes in it.
I hug you strongly and thank you for reading me.
